black stranger

2009-04-15T19:34:00.001+08:00

i've moved :)

http://atomstranger.wordpress.com

with loves,
elmo :)

2009-04-10T15:22:00.002+08:00

3 weeks flies...

gonna end my honeymoon period soon.
stress coming up!
:(

or should i say,
i'm already feeling the stress?
gosh..

is my choice of ward.
i will study.
perhaps i didnt study this hard before.

i'm proud!
at least i tried.
:)

i ought to know some common cases of my ward.
cos going back to ward tmr.
and with my preceptor of cos.
:)

another preceptor for me.

the way she talked
and the hungry-ness in her
are so similiar to G!

but not as attitude as G.
HAHA!

went back w45 yest with dahlia,
cos we ended work earlier.
:)

too bad baoyi not there!
so only chatted with G, shuqin and yajing for awhile.
:)

yes g,
your daughter, wearing a different uniform, came to visit you!
:)

it's raining now...
so feel like sleeping.
but i know i cant!
:(

alright,
i shall finish my homework 1st.
going out later for some chat.
:)

updates soon.
and all the best to those who are going to work next week!
:)

no longer sn (student nurse)
but RN for now...
:)

with loves,
elmo.

2009-04-05T17:16:00.002+08:00

end of my 2weeks foundation prog.
:)

happy or sad?
i really dont know.

i know i need to study now.
learn more about this and that.
which i hope i will.

i'm tired.
physically tired.
having headaches every now and then.
and i'm feeling weaker day by day.

solution:
sleep and rest more!
i wish i could,
but well...

enough of that.
i will take care of myself.
:)

replies to tag:

guai kia: thanks! but i'm feeling the stress now. gosh! new link for me? drop me a message instead okay! take care :)

bettina: yes, we got in! same blk, and i'm one level above you! :) see you tmr! time to gossip again! :)

seng: thanks ah seng! you better take care of yourself! :)

felicia: thanks chocolate! not over-whelming, but stress and reailty shock!

zulaiha: thanks thanks! when you starting work? hope you get into the ward you want too!

brenda: thanks triplet! my lunar birthday! wahahahahas :)

and thanks,
for the cake and joy.
i really appreciated it.
:)

thanks to the gang who helped,
:)

alright,
time to study.

bye!

with loves,
elmo

2009-04-01T20:53:00.003+08:00

i was being posted to my 1st choice ward!

or should i say,
most people either got into their 1st choice,
or they are posted to none of their choices.

so some were :) after knowing...
and the rest were :(

went to the ward for orientation today.
the sister was nice.
:)

not much different when i was posted there as a student.
but only different is,
wearing a different uniform.

i saw zul :)
i see him changed his trainee uniform to HCA.
and he sees me changed from student to a full time-nurse too.
:)

happy april fool everyone!
hope none of you got tricked!
:)

gonna do some homework.
lectures again for tmr!
BOO :(

oh,
happy 16th birthday triplets, brenda!
:)

with loves,
elmo

2009-03-30T19:46:00.002+08:00

i'm finally back from the busy weekend.

endured through the 1st week of foundation prog.
:)
with great company, lectures will never be bored.
cos we are not listening!
but at times,
we do listen okay!
right bettina!
HAHA!

just a start of second week of foundation prog,
haven know our ward yet.
is just so stress!

thought it would be announced today,
but didn't.
perhaps have to wait till tmr.
wed is already the clinical practice!
:( or :) ?
dont know....

went for chalet on fri.
it was a success!
bishan park express class '05 batch gathering!
:)

photos will be up soon.
i haven upload them yet
partly due to work and photo size.
sorry.

slept an hour plus then off to work on sat!
super sleepy.
thanks bettina for disturbing and keeping me awake.
:)

back to pasir ris after work.
second chalet for sj, treasure hunt.

nah, nothing much to say.

photos for treasure hunt will be up soon.
due to some problems,
it might take quite some time...
sorry...

bbq next.
helped to set up fire for instructor pit.
and one of the group pit too.
thanks for the tibits from BGSS and St Nick.
and mdm low's lollipop.
lol
:)

cabbed home after that.
drop bervin down 1st,
then hwee siang next,
reached home around 1am.

bathed and knocked out within 4mins.
amazingly, woke up after 10hours of sleep only!
boo!
:(

kellyn came over my house while waiting for peixuan and yy,
and she dozed off on my comfortable bed.
this shows how comfortable my bed is!
lol :)

met up for dinner with
sw, yy, px, mj and kel.
then watched movie!
confession for shopholic.
so KELLYN LIM's style!
LOL
:)

sent kellyn to bus stop,
then home sweet home!
:)

my start of second week,
yy's first day of work!
KAI GONG DA JI!
and soon will be kel's turn!
:)

i'm still deciding whether to make this private.
:(

with loves,
elmo.

2009-03-24T20:12:00.004+08:00

sad to say,
i already start work...
:(

was my first day of work yest.
suddenly felt so emo on sunday.

kind of stress too.
partly cos our ward assignment is not out yet.
which i'm quite worried for.
:(

woke up before the alarm went off.
and i didn't have enough sleep
bad start of the day.
but i'm alright :)

but i felt emo after changing onto the new uniform.
the feeling is totally different.
different uniform, different feeling.
:(

so i keep telling myself,
is a brand new day,
is the 1st day of work!
JIAYOU
:)

and i happily walked to the bus stop.

it's a usual routine,
but everything is different.
:(

had foundation aka honeymoon period.
and it's going to last for 21days!
poor butt....
:(

was being held back for today.
super tired.

19 days to go!
we shall enjoy!
it's our honeymoon period!
we have to enjoy please!
:)

and yesh,
bettina keep disturbing me during lectures!
keeping both of us awake!
but thanks :)

but lectures are always boring,
so in order to keep myself awake beside talking,
sms-ing was another 'job' other than listening.

i was sms-ing baoyi and hwee siang.
3 of us were studying in 3 different places,
but we were msg-ing.
lol :)

thanks for the JIAYOU msg!
hwee siang, pris and tingyu.
i appreciated it.
thanks :)

not looking forward for birthday.
history will repeat again like last year.
when friends are no longer friend,
everything is different.

i'm tired of it.
seriously.
i cant be bothered anymore.
thanks for making it worse.
cos it just makes me hate birthday even more.
and i dont want to cry myself to sleep on my birthday anymore.

knowing and thinking too much is always bad for health.
i know,
and yet i'm still doing that.
funny.

with loves,
elmo.

2009-03-21T18:47:00.009+08:00

just some updates and photos....

whole group of 10 randam people!
from the bottom left all the way up: yy, me, vivien, eve, chen mei, jessie, yi xin, xiao long, rou mei and jiaxuan.

there is a special link between 10 of us!
a very long link!
:)

we sang till nearly 4am in the morning!
supper next,
reached home at 7am.

and the cutest one happened to be..

the 4 of us are from nursing!
just only that we are of different groups.
how randam....
:)

out from library,
on the way for dinner...
I LOVE THEM! :)

our name tags!
:)

see the difference?
meaning of SN:
- student nurse :)
- staff nurse :(

any other individual photos will be sent thru phone..
:)

sang ktv again.
but with different groups of people.
:)

reached home at nearly 5am.
wash up, msg and zonked out!

had a bad sleep.
keep waking up in every few hours...
:(

out for lunch with family.
:)

online awhile,
and i went off to sleep.
:)

shall be my resting day at home.
:)

going start work in two days time.

no more chionging out,
no more singing ktv till early morning,
no more usual meet up,
no more, no more...

i shall start to prepare myself for work!
be positive :)

with loves,
elmo

2009-03-18T23:48:00.002+08:00

to me,
blog is just somewhere to vent out something.
or perhaps just to record what actually happened on certain days...

i know no point to make my blog private,
is not as if a fanclub.

but at least i feel safe.

not having to think what is appropriate,
and which is not.

i can just blog whatever i want.
and only let certain people to see it.

i shall think about it again.
:(

with tired-ness,
elmo.

2009-03-18T23:28:00.002+08:00

a slightly happy but more of an unhappy day.
:(

first,
i managed to wake up at 645am
even though i slept at 3am.
:)

i'm proud of myself okay!
for just 3 hours!
but i still managed to wake up.
:)

happily took 851.
and that damn bus breakdown at tiong bahru!
when i'm already late!

but it's okay.
bettina appeared!
and we took the next bus instead.
:(

damn cramped!
cos of all the people from 851 transferred to another bus.
- this is when i always hope that i have a car! -
and car license is always useless without a car!
:(

so reached HR around 10 mins later.
BUT we are not the LATEST!
there are people who are later than us!
EVIL WAHAHAHAHAHAS

sat with dhalia,
listening to some craps,
re-signing some forms that i already signed b4.

and took our name tag!
full name with STAFF NURSE below.
is still SN, but no longer a student nurse.
:(

then down to SNB to register.
the guards were damn attitude lah!
but i showed my BU SHUANG too!
:(

lunch at houseman,
and back to WorkLife to claim that 100 bucks of practicing license.
:)

then back to ward.
just want to thank g,
cos i lost her number.
:(

but i didn't talk much.
she is serving meds.
- do not disturb-
so ended up,
got her number from ah bao then msg g.
:)

chatted with ah bao.
i suddenly feel that everything is SO UNFAIR!
:(

result is not everything.
B might be a better grade for some,
or okay grade for some,
or even a bad grade.
:(

currently B to me,
is nothing.
grade B represents BAD.

no point having that.
:(

i know
there is no point fighting as well.
everything is out.
:(

but i still felt sad for them.
:(

with sadness,
elmo

2009-03-18T00:27:00.002+08:00

just went to watch marley & me with kellyn and peixuan.
:)

i cried abit.
not that i'm emotionless....
but compared to the both of them...
i guess mine is nothing.
haha :)

went to play pool awhile after movie.
k-pool layout changed actually due to smokers.
cool reason :)

then off to bishan for dinner.

happened that actually i was msging with my gf, hwee siang
but i didn't reply her for the last time.
cos was playing pool.

and so qiao.
we saw her at mrt while she was on her way home.
i know she is sad,
so just ask her to join us for dinner.
:)

after dinner,
next venue was actually bishan active!
gosh....

and i brought something for gf to make her happy as she requested.
i'm okay with that.
:)

as usual,
just normal chatting.
and climbing up and down at bishan active.
:)

went kellyn's house to lend toilet,
then home sweet home with peixuan and gf.
:)

alighted at mac bus stop.
accompanied gf to walk till kfc bus stop,
and i walked back to mrt station.
then REAL home sweet home for me.
:)

have to go HR tmr!
to SNB after that.
and i bet it will takes almost half of my day....
sian...

my god.
work in less than 1 week!
thanks guai kia for counting down for me lah!
:)

on a lighter note,
i got both B for my final attachment.
geron, OT, A&E and PRCP.

i'm so happy!
:)

but meanwhile,
i felt sad for others too.
:(

i'm alright...
cos i will be seeing alot of them tmr!

yes bettina,
you will see me tmr!
and dhalia too.
:)

i shall be guai and sleep early
i need to wake up at 6 plus - 7 tmr morning!
i doubt i can,
but i will try!
:)

nights...

with loves,

elmo

2009-03-16T21:29:00.002+08:00

oh ya,
my phone doesn't seem to work sometimes

and the best is i cant ans call during camp.
:(

so i decided to send it for repair!
for software upgrade too.
:)

i'm currently using my old phone.
:)

i might lose some of the new contacts...
it's okay.

some are just people i dont give a damn.
no point having the no!
haha

will ask again for no when i get back my phone!
:)

with loves,
elmo

2009-03-16T20:23:00.003+08:00

been MIA for a few days.
and i'm finally back from camp!
:)

i'm tired.
slept for straight 12hours,
but still,
is like nothing...
:(

i'm not going to blog about camp.
it's nothing.

and it's OVER!
:)

going camp is always bad for my health.
and i got alot of injuries!
:(

for com team,
don't be too upset.
at least you guys did your best.
:)

congratulation to my triplet, brenda!
champion team for nursing adult!
:)

thanks yy for SOMETHING!
you know i know!
:)

thanks sheng wei, tingyu, kellyn and yy
for listening to my craps and nonsense!
:)

thanks my parents for understanding.
cos they haven't been seeing me for straight 3-4 days.
:)

thanks GF hwee siang,
for those sweet messages during camp.
:)

that's all about this post.
i'm tired again.

off to bed.
:)

with loves,
elmo.

2009-03-11T02:58:00.002+08:00

happy 23rd birthday to my cousin, shiling!
:)

anyway,
i just read my cousin's blog.
and heard that his result was good.
2 As, 1 B and 1 C

and ya,

i'm touched by the way he blog,

from where he came from,
how he put in effort in studies,
how he survived through everything.

i'm really happy and feel proud for him.
what a smart cousin!
:)

hope he got what he wants.
a uni that he wanted to get in!
and i will get him what he wants.
a wallet to reward him!
:)

that's it.
:)

with loves,

elmo

2009-03-07T03:49:00.002+08:00

okay.

i collected my uniform!
:)

and this means that i'm started work soon!
provided that my medical result is okay.
:)

and i still went for cheryl's birthday celebration!
despite i'm so tired!
:(

but it was fun!
and was singing birthday song,
for don't-know how many TIMES!
lol

and we were the crew members while cheryl was the star of the day
crews include yy, yiting, puay hoon, zi peng, cheekai, peixuan, ah seng, sheng ming, tingyu and me!
:)

the gangsters and the charles angels went for this bunge jump thing without paying a single cent!
yes, all for the 6 persons without a cent!
but it was norway guy who treated them 3 tickets.

another 3 tickets were kindly sponsered by the staffs!
:)

left the area around 1am,
but!

just happened that jiaxuan drove past us.
and thought that she can drive me home!
but she went to some pub to EAT with her friends instead.

as usual,
i injured my ankle.
guess is the muscles around it.
it's common, i'm alright!
and it will heal by itself as like what yy said!
:)

and we took night rider home!
yy yiting puay hoon and me!
:)

was limping while walking home!
damnit!

luckily is after i took my uniform,
if not,
imagine i have to 'climb' up the hill !
LOL!

i shall play with my pet now!
off!

with loves,

elmo

2009-03-06T02:19:00.002+08:00

met up with dhalia, weiyan and archu today!
:)

first meet with dhalia with orchard,
cos dearest weiyan was late again.
:(

we walked to Lido 1st,
thinking of watching movie later,
but no movie in mind to watch.

weiyan came like super fast!
and we headed to far east.

walked around while waiting for archu to join us.
meanwhile weiyan was shopping for her scarf!
and she got one which approved by me and dhalia!
that marks our 1st mission :)
and abit catch up with huiyun! :)

archu joined us! :)
2nd mission is to help archu to find present for her friend's 21st birthday
and we headed to takashimaya!
:)

walked around,
looking at bags 1st as archu was thinking to get that for her friend.
but she ended up buying another gift instead!
lol.

next we walked to charles and keith.
3rd mission to get my belt!
and i brought it!
:)

then to heeren.
4th mission:
heading where for dinner as archu is leaving soon! :(
and we ended up at pastamania!
:)

YOU saw and went hiding away from us.
is it so hard to say HI to us?
not as if you know none of us.
i'm disappointed with YOU.
that's it.
:(

after dinner,
we sent archu to the nearest mrt,
and we continued to walk down...

next stop: PS
just one round and went to THE CATHAY!
and helped dhalia's cousin to do her survey too! :)

walking walking walking!
and finally our last stop:
BUGIS! :)

whereby weiyan brought her shoes there.
and she was the happiest girl for today!
:)

walked to bugis street.
and we found a shades that suits me and weiyan!
super lol.
cos have to wait till dearest weiyan to save up her money b4 getting her shades! :)

dhalia was super tired
and dragging her feet around.
so she suggested of going home instead.

they went home,
while i walked AGAIN to meet up with yy, sw, peixuan, ed and mingjie!

just as i stepped out of the mrt,
it started raining!

and damnit!
there is no shelter to where i'm heading!
:(

and with my tired feets,
i just walked slowly in the rain.
kind of stupid,
but i enjoyed it :)

i'm just like a kid,
playing with rain alone...
- not being emo. -

as usual,
chat chatting chat!
:)

took bus home :)
and yy was asking me to choose my own birthday present.

isn't it abit slightly early?
is still 1month plus away.
haha.

and i'm lack of anything i guess.
perhaps just a simple dinner will do.
will see when the date are nearer,
since both of us are starting work b4 that...
:)

i don't need surprise for birthday.
even just a simple msg will do too.
:)

i just want things to be as simple as possible.
or i should just celebrate with my family.
since i'm getting my very 1st pay around there too.
:)

plans in mind for my 1st pay:
- dinner with family.
- dinner with yy!
- wallet for cousin.
- save up :)

that's about it.

oh,
something bad happened.
i shall be good and stay at home more often.
:(

i haven been seeing my eldest sis till now,
though we stay under one roof!
these shows how LATE i wake up,
and how EARLY i reach home EVERYDAY!
:(

should i listen and stay at home tmr?
or should i go for cheryl's birthday celebration?

i'm lost.
i shall see what i can tmr!
:(

update again :)

with loves,

elmo

2009-03-05T01:07:00.004+08:00

just some notes for individual people.

*edited*

to baoyi:
take care of your nerves okay!
get well soon too :)
think won't be seeing you soon,
cos i'm gonna start work like real soon!
:(

to chocolate, felicia :
take care and get well soon!
and i'm gonna visit you tmr! :)

to darl joyce:
enjoy yourself in australia! :)
and you are coming back on my second day of work! :(
meet up again to take back your bear from me okay! :)

to dolly:
must update me re: 23rd march okay!
just me a call will do :)

to whole of nr0623:
graduated! :)
and all of us are heading to different areas.

like some already started working,
one going ns,
and the rest are waiting to start work soon.

no matter what,
all the best to everyone!
and see you on graduation day!
:)

to triplet sheng ming:
take care of yourself too!
especially your migrane okay! :)

to triplet brenda:
study hard and don't stress up yourself!
JIAYOU :)

to yy:
you already got into the ward that you always wanted :)
i'm really happy for you.
and shall celebrate for you soon,
though i'm seeing you almost everyday!
:)

to sheng wei:
hope you can get into the course that you want!
and all the best for your papers :)

to tingyu:
JIAYOU for your attachment and upcoming PRCP!
meet up soon!
we miss you badly :(

to kellyn:
don't MIA too much okay!
must appear in front of me at times ar!
i will angry ar!
:)

to hailing:
hope everything is going well for you at least!
meet up soon
:)

to peiying:
guess you got problem with relationship?
stay strong okay?
and so nice to see you today!
meet up soon :)

to jasmine:
life still surrounded by CK?
:)
meet up soon too! for mahjong :)

to peixuan:
you must rest at times.
and take GOOD care of your health okay!
is like super impt OKAY! :)

to cheryl:
happy belated 19th birthday!
:)

to gf, hwee siang:
i bet you miss me more okay!
hope to see you soon!
and my thumb drive too :)

to pris:
please eat more!
:)
- but i know this doesn't work. -

to sj sec 2s:
is training that tough,
or only footdrill part?

but no matter what,
the result isn't that impt.
and is experience that is gonna stay in you guys!
:)

and yy really put in effort!
3 CHEERS FOR HER :)

to cousin keith:
happy working!
and stay positive! :)

to mummy:
i will settle it one day.
i'm not in mood to do so that day.
let me be a stubborn kid for once...
:(

and last to myself:
please stop being emo!
sudden attack again :(
plus i'm mentally and physically tired...

i'm breaking down for once...
let me rest...

with tiredness,
elmo...

2009-03-04T03:16:00.002+08:00

went blog hopping before posting.

not much of update from friend's blogs.

so i guess everyone is busy with their stuffs now.

some busying with bfs/gfs,
with exams,
with their holidays,
with planning of up-coming events,
with their own stuffs.
etc..

i'm not really in emo state now.
but somewhere there.
how sudden.

perhaps is the songs i'm listening now.
yeah, is some emo-ing songs again.
:)

sometimes,
i just love listening to them.
in the middle of the night,
with no one around,
just alone.
:)

thinking through things that i normally won't think.
like some friends who just walk pass my life,
and some matters that i need to settle it fast.

i have yet to solve with mummy.
is hard for me at least.
so am i the one who is wrong now?
perhaps yes.

i'm tired.
one more card to make.
that's it.
:)

i shall rest for this year.
i'm not a person who can do it on the spot.
i need planning and design 1st.
and ideas...
:)

darl is flying later!
and yet i'm still thinking of what to do!
perhaps just something for her to read.
and not to cry?!
:)

i shall be nice and stop making everyone cry!
:)

i'm a nice kid!
-going to adult...-

with loves,

elmo

2009-03-03T01:19:00.002+08:00

just back from malaysia!
:)

went back since last thurs.
and supposed to be coming back on sunday,
but something cropped up.

so came back on monday instead.
with my mum.

main purpose is to visit my grandmum,
so didn't do much shopping.

plus cousin was working,
so no one drives me out.
though i'm also a driver,
but cant drive without my cousin...
:(

anyway,
went melacca on sat,
cos my cousin managed to take his leave.
:)

nothing much.
i'm not that kind who LOVES shopping.
so just normal walk around

only get things that i need
but nice chatting with my cousin. :)

i'm glad that even we are in two different countries,
yet we are so close.

perhaps we are of the same age.
but we are totally different character and personalities.
he's damn good in studies, while i just want to pass my exams will do.
one thing similar: we put friends way above ourself :)

he told me things that even his parents don't know.
and he actually teared while chatting in car.
but i understand why he actually cried.

perhaps is due to two different countires too,
singapore was said to be a safe country,
at least compared to malaysia.
so there were two different between my mum and his mum, which is my aunt.

my mum felt safe for me to go home late,
as long as i call home to inform her that i will be home late.
even though i'm a girl.

while my aunt felt super unsafe for him if he didn't reach home on time.
even though he drives.
he cant stay out late without permission.
and he is a guy!

that is the problem.
sometimes i'm proud of him,
but i pity him at times.
:(

alright,
enough of him.
i might be seeing him soon again :)

perhaps people learn to cherish after losing something.
after another cousin of mine passed away last year,
somehow i learnt the importance of relationship.

this relationship was built since young.
easy to build,
hard to maintain.

distance is not an excuse,
is whether did you put in effort.
is the thoughts that counts.
even a sms counts.
:)

perhaps it will be harder for us to meet up next time,
cos i'm starting work soon,
while he is going to further his studies too.
but i will do my best to maintain!
:)

i'm trying to solve another problem.
this time round,
is mummy.

nights everyone.
:)

with loves,

elmo.

2009-02-25T00:56:00.006+08:00

i'm back again.
lol

but i have been quite busy for the past 1 week.

18th feb:

celebrated yi ting's 21st birthday with the SJ gang @ fish & co.
we were just a super noisy gang lah. and we made yi ting sang 'don't lose your way' for us! haha.

totally mad, crazy and FUN!
:)

and HAPPY BIRTHDAY YITING!
:)

19th feb:
actually meeting up with my PRCP mates.
but it was cancelled in the end,
cos of the amount of ppl attending!

but well,
i ended up meeting with yy and kel instead
to shop for GYM's 21st presents!
:)

we shopped from city hall to PS!
walk walking walked!
haha.
:D

though abit tiring,
but sometimes,
it's just fun to have great buddies like them!
:)

20th feb:
nothing much.

just met up with hwee siang to pass her my thumbdrive.
and dinner with yy.
:)

then went to yoga's lin concert!
@ singapore indoor stadium!

he's okay,
at least he can sing well!
but something shocked,
he actually sang "cha shao bao" on his own concert!

but the guests were good!
SHE was the best,
is like their own concert! :)

21st feb:
GYM's 21st birthday!
@ aranda country club!

stayed over for 1 night.
with lots of fun ppls!
:)

THE NOISY SJ GANG!
:)

22nd feb:
left GYM's chalet at 6pm plus...

tinghui came to fetch me.
cos i'm late for home!
LOL

then went jurong for dinner with my whole family!
:)

played mahjong with my cousins,
and i'm the big winner whom won only $2!
:)

23rd feb:
met up with kaifeng, charlie, yy and kel!

we went J8 for lunch!
and saw hoi yan again.

then to pit stop for board-games.
FUN :)

after that,
kaifeng and charlie left to meet thier friends.

and the 3 of us happily walk from clarke quay to city hall to MS!
we just love walking and the distance is not VERY long!
haha.

shopping at MS is a chore to me!
i almost fainted!
and is the 1st time i walked around the whole building by myself.
cos that 2 is busy paying!
haha.
but i'm alright! :)

24th feb:
called up the outram polyclinic to check whether my blood result is out
and the person told me:
'actually the bloods result should be already out in 3 days times.'
but the doctor told me to wait for 1-2 weeks.
luckily i went today and not 2weeks later!
:(

and yeah,
i'm so called offically diagnosed with anemia.
and minor thalessemia trait.

i waited for 25mins for my turn,
but less than 1 min,
i'm out!
and that costs me $9?!

the doctor didn't says much about the thalessemia and anemia,
cos she assumed i know lah.
so is it a good or bad thing?
:(

i paid the bill,
and ran to staff clinic just to pass them my memo.

the staff was nice,
cos they actually closed at 1630hrs.
but i reached at 1640hrs.
:)

just to cut short,
i'm too tired...

went dinner with baoyi and sister tay.
nice chat.
but i'm actually abit sad after the whole chat.
:(

og was on night shift lah.
so i called her after dinner.
to ask her hurry come work!
:)

and she took cab!
oh my,
and she claimed that,
in this way, she won't be breathless and is the fastest way.
- mind you, is a distance from the mrt to the ward -

so i talked and accompanied her awhile
since she reached so early and took cab cos of me!
:)

but ended up,
i was late meeting yy at heeren!
:(
sorry sorry!

she finally brought her fossil watch!
:)

wanted to catch a movie,
but we were late.
either it started or the ticket are selling fast.
:(

so we just had supper at XIN WANG instead.
just normal chatting but only the 2of us.

i love the feeling.
just like having private time,
but yet is not alone.
:)
simple and easy...

alright,
it's such a long post!
oh my!
but i'm proud of myself!
:)

nights :D

with loves,

elmo.

2009-02-18T13:04:00.002+08:00

WOORAY!

everything solved!
in a super peaceful way!
:)

i'm super happy!
and i'm going out with a smile!
:)

with loves,

elmo

2009-02-18T04:02:00.004+08:00

just to clear out some misunderstanding.

the previous post was regarding 2 different matters,
one is regarding my anemia,
another one is regarding a malaysia trip which makes me guilty :(

is not my condition that makes me worry or whatsoever!
i'm not worry about it.
i'm not, but i guess my parents are.
lol.

i guess most ppl mixed up both together.
i'm sorry for the mess.
:(

and yeah,
i'm really alright.
not feeling giddy or anything.
i don't really have the symptoms of anemia.

and i'm still waiting for my thalassemia result.
so yeah,
is just suspected for currently.
:)

so no worries guys!
i'm really alright.
i won't faint or anything okay!
LOL.

and yeah,
i'm fully booked for this week.
which means i won't be rotting my time at home!

i'm still thinking of a way to settle things in a more peaceful way.
but is hard.
and is killing me.
just hope that things won't get worsen!
:(

how i wished things didn't happen.
and one lesson to learn.
never take things for granted.
:(

with loves,

elmo

2009-02-17T01:34:00.002+08:00

damnit.

i went for my medical checkup this morning.
i'm diagnosed with anemia.
and suspected thalassemia.
:(

took some blood tests at both clinical lab and polyclinic.
total of 3 EDTA tubes and 3 plain tubes!
and yeah,
i'm already lack of blood!

and thanks baoyi for accomapny!
:)

caught a movie @ 2130hours.
with yy and sw @ hub.
'look for a STAR'

but something happened at the ending part of the movie.

i received a msg.
which i almost cried because of that.

but i didn't.
just feeling emo, bad and guilty after the movie.
mixed emotions...
:(

i didn't want things to end up like this!
i'm really sorry.
but i do have my own concerns with my parents re: anemia!
:(

randomly called mimi just now around 12midnight.
you must be thinking i'm siao.
but yeah,
both of us are talking about the same problem over the phone.
:(

perhaps we are in really deep trouble now.
or i should say currently in deep shit!
:(

2 major things happened today.
my medical checkup and mimi's sudden family trip.
:(

i know we are sort of delaying your trip,
but we really didn't mean to.
things just happened today.
and we have just THAT time to react.
:(

and your msg came in
when we haven settle anything yet.
seriously, i'm shocked to see the msg.

and all i can say is only
sorry.
and nothing else.

we are also delaying your cambodia trip,
just because we are tagging along.
:(

i shall think about it now.
and yeah,
no mood for anything currently
except this problem.
:(

with guilt,

elmo

2009-02-13T05:20:00.002+08:00

am i doing the right thing?
:(

i'm lost in somewhere.
no one is gonna get me out of here.

i shall think of a way out.
is pointless waiting.

i will give up for now,
i'm tired.

i should take a rest before continue to walk.
but i just realised,
i don't have much time left.

whatever!

and on a lighter note,
i will enjoy my holiday to max,
even if i had to stay in spore till i start work.
:)

i enjoyed my friends accompany!
thanks yy and sw!
best buds!
:)

that's it!

with loves,

elmo

2009-02-11T04:38:00.002+08:00

okay,
i'm back.
like just a few mins ago?
LOL!

cos i just want intro my triplet! :)
mr lee sheng ming and ms brenda lee!
damn cute right.

we named ourselves : the triplet!
cos we got the same surname : LEE
cos we are the lefties!
and even our age gap is the same : 2years!

see,
the 3 of us with 3 SAMA-SAMA points! :)

and yea,
i'm the oldest among all :( already graduted from poly!
second is sheng ming, still studying in poly.
and the youngest is brenda, who is still in her secondary school!
how cool.

so keep in touch, my triplet!
all the best to the both of you in studies! :)

and i shall enjoy the rest of my holiday,
since i'll be starting work soon!
:(

take care triplet.
see you two soon!
:)

with loves,

elmo.

2009-02-11T03:20:00.002+08:00

it's so damn late now.
but i'm still spending my sleeping time uploading all the photos.

damnit!
one photo size is like 1.25MB,
and it took like nearly 30mins to upload 20 photos!

so stop rushing me for all the photo.
i need time as well.
i'm not a machine too.
:(

i just realised i got more than 2000 photos to UPLOAD!
so it will takes me a few days to upload all photos and i need to sit infront of the com all the day!
NO WAY!
:(

was blog hopping while waiting for the photo to be uploaded in multiply,
nothing much.
so few ppl is updating their blog too
:(

then went to facebook to upload some photo as well.
since my attachment buds will download from facebook instead of my multiply.
i'm just doing another job for them!
:)

but out of sudden,
i got this feeling,
'don't go back to my PRCP ward.'

i don't know why.
but it just comes into my mind.

perhaps i scared

perhaps i should just try out another ward
perhaps is the surrounding ppl
perhaps is the feeling
perhaps perhaps perhaps...
perhaps i'm more of disappointed by....

something did happened.
perhaps i'm just thinking too much.
which i hope i am.
:)

however no matter what,
the final decision don't lies on me.
i'm alright.

like what i told my mom,
i will accept the fate,
like how i got posted back into my PRCP ward.
as long as i got what i want,
i'll be glad.
:)

anyway,
finally settled the outing place with mimi and baoyi.
just waiting for them to confirm me with the timing.
and yeah,
we are meeting up this coming friday!
so excited!
:)

shall discuss my problem with baoyi then.
since she already know something.
:)

anyway,
og is sick plus she is working that day,
so she cant join us!
get well soon, G!

that's about it.
will be updating soon!
:)

with loves,

elmo.

2009-02-07T04:52:00.002+08:00

okay
is abit random...

but i shall changed my name to
ELMO! :D

the most wonderful name!

cos i love to emo.
according to my FRIENDS!
lol.

so next time i shall intro myself as ELMO!
:D

with loves,

elmo

2009-02-07T03:28:00.003+08:00

gosh.

i already signed my employment contract.
and i'm like starting work real soon.
23rd march 09.

damn sian.
i haven really enjoy my holiday yet,
and like in 1 1/2 months times,
i'm gonna start working...
:(

went back for sjab
and i realised something today.

effort don't equal to worth.

i realised no matter how much effort and time you put in,
it just doesn't tally with how much it worth.

i'm sad
i'm disappointed
and that might be the last card i made for you

suddenly,
i lost the interest of making cards.

and from today onward,
cards will be hand-made for special people whom i think they worth it.

no more rushing for time.
no more thinking for ideas.
no more spending money on art materials.
no more this and that.
and perhaps no more card-making as well.

those who are holding any cards that i made,
that might be the last card you received too.
:(

and i'm giving up on making one for myself as well.
interest?

is gone.

with loves,

stranger

2009-01-31T23:10:00.004+08:00

alright.
i'm back to clean up my blog...
and it gonna be a damn long post FYI.

happy NIU year to everyone first.
i know is abit late,
but better than nothing right!
wahahahahahas.
:D

and yesh,
is new year.
which means i finished my PRCP,
my final attachment,
a 3months straight attachment.
so i'm considered as half graduated from NYP!

no more school, no more attachment.
what is coming up?
perhaps is work.

what i heard:
i might be starting work around end of march.
damn sad.
but it might not be,
cos i haven sign the employment form yet.
so let's wait and see.

okay, shall drag back to my prcp.

firstly,
just a few people that i would like to thank:

1. my dearest preceptor, rozainah aka G!

i shared the same preceptor with jenna, one of the NP girls who is doing her PRCP too!

something to admit: i don't like her at first!
- cos she is too strict, too fierce to me.
- she left me so helpless sometime during shift.
- i don't like the way/tone she talk to me.

BUT as it goes along,
- she is strict with me, cos she said i'm too playful.
- she left me helpless, perhaps i scared of her initially, so i will try to find out the answer by myself and remember it. is just another way for me to learn. she doesn't want to spoon-feed me.
- the way/tone she talked is like that, and that can't be change! HAHA

i work with jenna for the first 2months,
and i saw her cried for twice.
at first i tot G scolded her too harsh.
so i told myself that i won't cry no matter how harsh G scolded me.
then i realised is not, i know the reason behind.
just that G is more strict to jenna compared to me.

ever since jenna left the ward for her OT and ED attachment,
i was left alone with G and we got closer.
by then, i'm already used to her temper, the way she work, and her scolding as well.
and everyone was saying my attitude was similar to G! HAHA!

being too used to her,
i started to bargain with her sometimes.
and perhaps is also my last month of PRCP,
somehow she will give in to me sometimes.
but i know her limits,
so i have to stop before the line.
:D

though i didn't cry for once thoughout my 3months of PRCP,
but i made G cried on my last day!
i don't mean to, but i knew she will cry after reading the book...

mostly cos of the present i made for her.
is a normal hand-made book with what i want to say to her.
perhaps is the last page. WAHAHAHHAHAS
those who know should be laughing lah!

no matter what,
i'm thankful to have her as my preceptor.
and congratulation to her as she is getting married soon!
:D

2. my dearest half preceptor, shu qin!

as i said before, she is the one who teaches me when G is not around.
being a new staff as well,
we learned together.
when we faced a new problem, she was the one who find out the answer and tell me the solution, cos i was too busy with my in-charge work.

we worked together for my first 2months,
but not the last month, due to different shift plus she was having her AL.
we only worked together for one day on my last month!

but no matter what,
thanks for
- being the one who guides me along the way,
- being the one who listens to my problems,
- being the one who lend her locker for my camera,
- being the one who tolerated my attitude (just for once)

thanks for everything, shu qin!
though we might not the chance to work together in the future,
but i'm really glad to know you.
:D

3. the other 11 survivors!
mei leng, dahlia, weiyan, wawa, siti ayu, xu hong, hoi yan, zheng yong, adelina, mimi and archana.
and not to forget about jenna, shu fen and xi min too.

just being there to support one another to fight!
all the best to everyone.
and keep in touch!

cos we fought through the 3months together!

4. the staffs of ward 45, which includes
- grace, who always wanted me to write the whole story in my report.
- yajing, the one being forced to use left hand by parents! LOL
- wani, another left-hander.
- bernice, whom i took my 12 cases for the first time!
- jasmine, a fun and cute staff to work with.
- sister sharon, a cute sister who don't know how to start scolding people!
- joanne, a sweet and the one who cant act fierce! HAHA
- khad, joker!
- fadhillah, first to work with as in charge!
- suba, another cute EN who helped me to do changes.
- marlou, who i worked with the most being a junior in charge!
- baoyi, my sister!
and alot more!

that's all i guess.

and i'm even closer to baoyi now ever since we did our night shift together.
LOL! :)

i'm the white curry, while she is the black curry!
and all is because of G, our mum!
long story.
too lazy to type :)

those who knows, i guess is our "family members" only.
haha.

i really enjoyed my posting this round,
as compared to the previous time in the same ward.
perhaps the duration is longer,
and we got closer with the staffs this time round.

however, 50% of me doesn't want to come back,
while another half of me wanted to.
how confusing!
but no matter what,
i don't have the final say! :(

and yesh,
i'm having my holiday now!
wahahahahahas.

got alot of KIV programme.
just waiting to be confirm.

and ah ma going for another op again soon,
so everything can only confirm once ah ma's op appointment is settle!

meanwhile,
i shall slack my day at home to rot first.
and finally i have the time to do something for myself.

these few years,
i had been making cards for alot of people.

like friend's, classmates and mummy's birthdays, attachments for individual staffs and wards as well as for my sister's friend birthday.

but none is for myself!

and now when i wanted to do something for myself,
i'm lack of ideas.
i hate repeating designs.
:(

i'm in deep shit.
lol.
i shall see what i can do with all the art material i had now.

i shall stop buying papers for now!
and save some money~

anyway,
is late now. 0314 hours.

but who cares?
i graduated~!

i can sleep all day long!
and then help peixuan to finish up her videos!

till then,

with loves,

stranger

2008-12-31T11:15:00.002+08:00

happy new year to everyone!

just a short update.
cos i'm going to work later.
which ends at 9.30pm!

not sure going anywhere to countdown yet.
but i doubt i have the mood.

left less than 20 days of attachment.
but i'm already dragging myself to work almost everyday

the thought of attachment makes me fear.

can i survive through till the end?
i don't know.

but yet,
i'm still dragging myself to work in order to survive.

till then,

with loves,

stranger

2008-12-05T18:41:00.003+08:00

alright.
is the start of dec.
the last month of the year!
:D

what i had been busying with since my last post:
- still having attachment.
- nco pre-camp
- busy sleeping!

that's about it.
haha.

super no life right?
partly due to shift work as well.
:(

alright,
further details of each event.
lol.

nothing much about pre-camp.
cos i shouldn't reveal the details yet.
and i don't know whether i can post the photos online anot first
so it's still in my camera.
haha

back to attachment.
two more days to go,
and is the end of my 4th week.

1month just passed like this.
it's faster than i thought.

anyway,
i just started to take cases for this week.
is still okay lah.
still abit unclear about there and here lah.
just have to learn slowly.

and i haven have any chance to work with my preceptor yet!
since last week till now.
it's okay.
cos i enjoyed working with shu qin instead!
:D

though she is new,
but she is the first to teach me things.
from admission to discharge. from explaining every forms and how to label.
from being junior in charge to the room in charge.

perhaps she feels abit guilty of not being able to teach me when she is busy plus she is new.
so she teaches me whenever she is free.

or perhaps she is just one year older than me,
so we are more like friends lah!
i swear i only know her after being attached to the ward.
lol

and finally,
i got feedback from my own preceptor today.
though most of the feedback were from others instead,
but it's okay.
cos we are in different shift since last week till today.
so she didn't really assess me when i was a junior-in-charge.

overall of the feedback was still okay.
nothing much about being junior-in-charge.
just be more PROACTIVE and participate of the junior's work.
documentation was good.
and lastly,
there is still roomS for improvement.

that will always be the last sentence for feedback!
wahahahahahaha.

so my objectives till next week:
- be more proactive
- do changes on my own as possible!

that will mark the end of my 4th week anyway.

just realised i blog too much about attachment!

but one last things that i'm felt so sad about:
i'm on night shift on christmas eve and christmas too!
GOSH!
even shu qin feel sad for me!
through i don't really celebrate christmas,
but almost everyone is havin their PH,
guess only me is down for attachment!

perhaps i shouldn't be feeling sad over that,
cos i think is gonna be fun?
as that will be the first ever night shift!
wahahahahas.
i shall stop feeling sad!
:D

anyway,
plans for next week.

- still having attachment for my 5th week!
- will be going down to hq for the exam.
- hopefully can pass mummy her card.

that's about it for the whole two weeks.

till then,

with loves,

stranger

2008-11-22T20:01:00.004+08:00

okay,
i'm back once again.

been busying with my prcp for the past 2nd week.

was the end of my 2nd week yesterday,
which means i still gt 10 more weeks to go!
JIA YOU!

2round coming in this ward for 1week plus,
something is different like their staffs.
but something is still the same,
which i dislike since the other round.

are all the male staff in this ward always the same?
be it the old or new.

anyway, something to happy about,
cos i got my off days on the weekends from week 1 to 3!

but something not to happy about,
i get tired more easily now.
due to the morning shift after my afternoon shift!
i'm following my precetor except for her night shift

i seem so dead in the morning,
my face is pale, and the going-to-faint anytime!
my CI actually came up to me and asked whether i'm going to faint!
lol.

talking about my preceptor,

she seem fierce at first,
but she is quite friendly sometimes.

i did talk to her few days back,
she is cute lah,
cos she told me something about herself.

i didn't really follow her for this whole week,
cos i'm still doing my own junior work!
and there is another NP student who is also under the same preceptor as me!

i'll still be doing my junior work for next week,
my preceptor wants me to function independently as an EN!
:D

i'm okay with it lah,
cos my preceptor wants me to continue one step by one step!
lol

so what i have been doing for the past 1week plus:
- parameters
- changing drip
- giving nebuliser
- doing some changes
- off plug
- charting i/o
- bring patient to toilet
- changing diaper
- feeding NGT

and one funny thing i have done:
searching HIGH and LOW for patient's watch!
and i found it in the toilet sink.

but through this treasure hunt,
one of my ward sister came to search with us too.
she actually wore a pair of gloves and open all the trash bags!
it stinks!
but we still continued!

from year1 till now,
first time i saw a ward sister actually came to help us to find something doing all the dirty job!
so cool.
i really respect her from my heart!
:D

alright,
next week i'm going for NCO pre-camp.
and already changed my off days!
thank god, my ward has a good sister!
lol

so i have to work for another 5days before my next day off day,
and i have camp to attend!
which means i will only see my preceptor for 2more days due to different off days!

oh ya,
one thing bad,
we know our shift every 2weeks only!
so sian.

why cant we know at least the whole month?
so it will be easier to plan something beforehand lah!

enough said of my attachment!
:)

alright,
what i did for the past few weeks before and during my prcp:
- going out.
- making mummy's birthday card.
- packing my messy stuffs.

last but not least:
rotting at home doing nothing!
:)

anyway,
happy birthday to my mum and mummy!
since their actual birthday is only 1day different!

mummy's card still with me lah!
both of us are too busy with our own stuffs!
especially she got o's level things going on!

so hope to meet up with her soon,
perhaps before she fly?
:D

got to go liao.
need to do some handwork about some medication first.
so that it will be easier for me!

till then!

take care
:D

with loves,

stranger

2008-10-30T00:31:00.002+08:00

was listening to jay chou's latest song.
there is this song called - 稻香

only the chorus was singing.
haha.

i went on to look for the lyrics of this song.
and i found a english version of this song too.
just a translation from chinese to english.

so i was reading,
i find it damn meaningful.

lyrics of 稻香:

If you have too many complaints towards this world
When you fall down you don't dare to continue walking forward
Why must people be so weak, depraved
I ask you to turn on the TV and see
How many people bravely try hard to continue walking for their life
Shouldn't we be content with what we have?
You should cherish everything even if you don't possess it

I still remember you said your home was the only castle,
you continue to run with the fragrance of the rice and the flowing river
Smiling, the dreams when you were young, I know
Don't cry, let the fireflies lead you to escape, the eternal dependence of the folk song in the country

Just go home
Go back to the happiness at the very start

Don't be so easy to give up, it's just like I say
For dreams you can't achieve, switch it for another and it'll be fine
Put some colour into your life, firstly paint the colour you like on love
Come on and smile, merit and fame aren't the goals
Let yourself be happy, this is what you call meaning

The paper airplane from my childhood, it's finally flown back to my hand now
That so called happiness, running barefoot in the fields chasing crickets and getting tired
Picking fruits without permission and getting scared from being stung by bees, who's sniggering?
I lean on the scarecrow while being blown by the wind while singing while sleeping
Oh oh, if the sunshine sprinkles on the road then I won't be afraid of being broken-hearted
You should cherish everything even if you don't possess it

I still remember you said your home was the only castle, you continue to run with the fragrance of the rice and the flowing river
Smiling, dreams when you were young, I know
Don't cry, let the fireflies lead you to escape, the eternal dependence of the folk song in the country

Just go home
Go back to the happiness at the very start

i like those lyrics in red.
so meaningful.

i love this song.
finally not a emo song from jay chou.
LOL

naf's birthday coming.
and she is holding a small party at her house.
woohoo.

that might be a small class gathering as well.
:)

either going to make something for her or buy something!
wahahahahahas.
:D

i'm looking forward to that.
i miss everyone!
:(

stranger

2008-10-26T02:03:00.002+08:00

suddenly felt emo while walking home just now...

is just a usual route that i walked almost everyday.
but is different this time round.
perhaps due to the different atmosphere.

i saw people busy with the wedding preparation,
making sure everything goes right for tmr.

i saw friends saying goodbye at the carpark,
wishing that he would stay even longer.

i heard the sound of those mahjong 'banging' on one another,
gossiping about them.

i heard baby crying,
perhaps wanting mummy to carry while waiting for milk.

i saw some old drunkard sleeping on the bench,
waiting to be awake.

i came across this auntie who is asking for money,
when is already so late

and last but not least,
cockroaches and rats running under my foot finding food.

just a normal and usual route that i took.
but i haven seen anything similar before.

the wind is cold.
too cold for me to take it.

just as a taxi drove past me,
how i wished the passenger was someone i know.
but no.

loneliness attacked me.
and it almost killed me as well.

it have been a long time ever since i felt like that.
too many things kept inside me.

it's hard to say,
cos emo only came at night/ midnight.
so who can i tell when i'm ready to say?

no one.
HA HA!

just a 5-10mins walk to home,
but i realized what i saw is about a human life.

life about A and Z,
when dating, they hoped that time will stop at that sweetest moment and never bide goodbye.

after which is marriage, hoping for the best and the most perfect wedding that they ever had!

baby Y came next, forming a wonderful family.

as the kid Y grew, A and Z grew too...

mahjong was one of the weekend activities whereby friends came and gossiped about others.

one bad habit of Z, he enjoyed drinking with friends. but he's lousy in drinking.

A always had a hard time finding Z.

years passed,

Z passed away, leaving A alone and their kid Y formed his own family.

but economic crisis destroyed Y! the bad debts he owed was a huge amount.

mummy A sold away their only house in order to save Y.

while Y was looking for jobs, mummy A felt that she is a burden to Y.

A left the house and went begging for money.

and years passed...
A went to heaven to accompany Z...

story ended.

i don't know how true it is at the last part.
but aging population was a problem in Singapore.

whatever it is,
it's part and parcel of life.

SHENG (birth) LAO (old) BING (sick) SI (death)

stranger

2008-10-21T00:01:00.002+08:00

i'm sorry to disturb you just now.
i don't mean to.

i'm sorry that i didn't left you alone.
i didn't want to.

i'm sorry that i only know the news awhile ago.
when peiying called.

i'm sorry for not showing concern to you.
i didn't know.

i'm sorry for being your friend.
and did all the above.

i'm sorry for myself.
cos i hate it all.

i'm sorry cos i know i'm always not there.
but i never receive your call.

being friends, isn't easy afterall.

stranger

2008-10-17T19:25:00.003+08:00

alright.
all my files are GONE!

wah,
damn sad lah!
and i only got a few past photos with me.

i lost all the ex st-john photos!
i'm super sad for now.
:(

so those who have all the past photos,
please send/email to me!
thanks :)

or maybe ck can help me to recover my files?
i really hope he can do it!
if not...

enough of the sadness...

anyway,
it's end of my 2weeks attachment @ cgh.

finally!
i don't mind being posted there.
but i need 3hours to travel everyday!
it simply sucks.
:(

throughout my 10 days of travelling to east side,
i realised that east people don't like to say 'sorry' or 'excuse me'
cos they simply just push and make their way through.

i got push by at least 3 people everyday.
from city hall to simei.
which i'm super pissed with it.

especially those china people who loves to carry big bags.
they don't even say sorry if they step on you.
they loved to stand just outside the door,
and blocked the way for passengers to alight.
even china students are doing that!

oh god.
that was a bad experience throughout my 10days of attachment!

but other than the travelling part,
attachment was alright.

ED was fun.
most of the staffs were good.
and get to try triage.
:)

OT is more of bored.
we cant get to see alot of cases as we wanted too.
but as well,
it's okay.

i didn't get to scrub,
cos most of the cases were major,
and instruments were another problem.

got to see amputation.
blood isn't flowing, is like fountain!
:S

so OT is not my kind!
gosh.
:(

{edited}
cheekai came over to recover all my old files!
YEAH~

shall update photos tmr when my com recovered!
lol.

alright.
i need slp badly now.
to pay back what i lost for travelling to east for 30hours!
lol.

till then!

with loves,

stranger

2008-10-12T13:31:00.002+08:00

finally back.
thanks to mr tang chee kai!

he was at my house to fix this damn com till 5.30am!
sorry that i took so much of your time!
but he was here for another purpose!

he waited so long,
but nothing happen in the end.

and everything is at my house now.
perhaps ck is coming back later.
i'm still waiting for his reply first.

alright.
i'm tired...

and OT attachment starts tmr.
i'm dead again.
another 5more days to travel over to simei
just for a 8hours attachment!
:(
i need to wake up at 6am if not i will be late!
gosh!

enough of that.
i shall update again when i finish my OT posting.

will update both ED and OT posting tgt.
haha!

with loves,
stranger

2008-10-01T13:23:00.004+08:00

yeah, i'm back in blogspot!

i'm done with the F1 stuffs.
photos up at multiply!
check that out!
:D

had fun throughout the 3days despite that is tiring.
reported for full shift on the first day,
afternoon shift on the 2nd and 3rd day.
and i reached home at 3am for the first 2days!

tinghui was nice to fetch us at HQ on the last day!
and ate supper cum dinner too.

it has been so long ever since i stepped in to HQ.
but for this F1,
i went HQ for straight 5days!
lol

and throughout the 3days,
we collected around $30K in total!
that is alot alot alot!

was counting the $2 dollar note like siao!
and mdm low was nice to treated us at jack's place!
the bill was more than $300 i guess cos there were 12 of us there!
my god.

and mingjie was the joke of the day!
being the 'birthday boy'
and we guess the manager fall in love with him!
wahahahahahahs.

photos up at ck's blog or my multiply!
haha.

alright, that's all about f1.
shall update again when i know the result of the tins....

and finally met up with hailing yesterday!
why finally?
cos our last meeting was like my birthday!
6 months ago!
so singapore isn't that small afterall!
LOL

nice chat hailing and shengwei!
and at least i had some updates of hailing...

to hailing:
is time that you need.
TIME to think, understand, forgive, forget, and most imptly to heal.
i have some 'thinking',
but i'm not gonna tell you.
:D

okay,
after catching up with hailing,
shengwei and me went to play pool instead.
and met up with peixuan and ck for late night movie!

finished at 3am,
went home, bath-ed...
SLEPT!

woke up before 9am due to a sms,
but i still continue to sleep after that.

i'm too tired!
no more late night for me i guess.

attachment next week,
and i need to re-adjust my body clock again!
GOSH!

got to go,
update again...

with loves,

stranger

2008-09-17T02:10:00.002+08:00

just another update!

my dearest peixuan came over to accompany me for dinner today!
she came with pris.
and she brought her favourite chicken rice, honeydew and a peach tea drink for me as well!

so sweeet huh!
i'm so gan dong!

and oh,
i'm so glad cos the hospital got nothing nice to eat!

thanks the both for coming!
wahahahahahas.

my last day in the ward!
in less than 11hours later!
:D

anyway,
i thanked her by being awake till now!

all thanks to yanyin again!
but it's okay.

i'm guai kia!
though i'm damn sleepy now!

signing off...

all i wanted is have a good sleep for NOW!
:(

with loves,

stranger

2008-09-16T08:44:00.003+08:00

okay.
i'm back here at last.
:)

hasn't been updating here after peixuan's birthday.
but i had been updating myself in another blog.
haha.

for all photos for any event,
please refer to
atomstranger

and that's another blog of mine too!
i will be updating both blogs.
:D

anyway,
though is over,
but i still want to say:

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY KELLYN LIM!
:D

haha.
sept is kellyn's birthday month!
the last birthday of our gang!

i'm so glad that it's over!
and finally i can save some money!
GOSH!

cos i spent a big bomb on my wonderful camera!
but no regrets!
:D

and i'm having my attachment now!
YEAH!
so i can save even more!
i hope :D

oh ya,
i left with 2days in AMKCH.
which is today and tmr!
oh, i miss afiqah and bettina

will be going st luke's for another 2 days.

and what i'm waiting for....
my 2weeks holidays!

then my OT and ED posting!
:D

WOORAY!
will be going malaysia next week i guess.
planning for my 2weeks holidays is not fully out yet!

so can book me in advance! LOL

but 26, 27, 28 guess i will be helping out in the sjab for F1 thing.
to be confirm soon.
haha.

if nothing goes wrong,
that's about it.
:D

for more updates,
either stay faithfully to my blog,
or another blog site of mine too!
:D

till the next time!

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-30T12:47:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY, PEIXUAN!

she PS-ed me yesterday!
:(
but it's okay.
wahahahahahahas.

best wishes to you!
see you later.

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-29T19:00:00.002+08:00

kids nowadays...

don't know what is in their minds...
and i guess they don't know how to think sia...

anyway,
we were like watching kids show just now.
i mean at the bus stop.
LOL.

was eating pocky and chatting throughout.
haha.

the show not interesting leh.
but made alot of jokes there as well.

P.S: i'm not a joker...

i'm just there to destress everyone.
LOL.

nothing much to blog about.
i'm bored.

i need more rest and sleep for now.

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-23T01:36:00.001+08:00

oh ya,
it's archana birthday today!
so happy birthday to you!

hope we got the same attachment place for PRCP!
AND I LOVE YOU LOADS!
:D!

2008-08-23T00:48:00.003+08:00

finally everything is over.
and i can sit infront of my com to blog.
:)

all papers are over!
i'm glad.
be it the result is good or bad.

but those 4papers are meant to kill us!
and yesh,
we were killed!

okay.
i had almost every emotion throughout the start of the paper till the end.
from happy till sad to emo awhile!

jiaxuan's chalet was held over the last weekend.
and that killed me badly!
ton-ing over is bad for health.
i know,
but i'm still doing it.

and i rushed throughout to study.
even if i had to wake up at 3am to study.

but is over.
i shall have a good rest on sunday.
i love nua-ing at home...
and my health is way under normal....

oh ya.
just had my class bbq!
that was the first ever bbq for our class!

though got abit cocked up,
but nevertheless,
i guess everyone enjoyed it!

and now i wonder how much mr tang paid for everything.
i'm quite of guilty over that.

shall settled the money with him on monday then will know...
so just a BIG THANKS to him for so much effort and money he put in!

photos will be upload in my class blog soon i guess.
let's wait!
haha

meanwhile,
just some words for the individual:

to george:
i hope you are feeling okay now.
anything just give us a call?
meet up soon!

to my whole class:
thanks for making an effort down for the BBQ! :D
i'm glad to be with you guys for almost 3 years.
hope the friendship will continue even though we might not see one another again.
i can't promise there will be another class gathering,
but hopefully there will be one after our PRCP!
cheers to everyone,
and keep in contact :D

to jiaxuan:
happy 21st birthday sis!
20-08-2008.
and i msg you on the 20-08-2008 @ 2008 hours.
cool right?
and you owe me a dinner treat!
wahahahahahas

to yanyin kellyn and shengwei:
thanks for coming down my sis's chalet despite all the tests and races coming up.
:D
and thanks for the studying time together.
if not.......

to tingyu:
happy advance birthday to you first.
haha.

to tinghui:
thanks for the food.
i'm quite guilty about your food lah!
but still a big thanks to you!

going over to tingyu's party tml.
but i'm so dead now.
so i doubt i got any energy for tml!
:(

from last friday till now,
i haven got a good rest yet!
how bad, how sad.

alright,
i shall end here.
update again when my body is back to normal range!
nights and take care!

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-08T22:07:00.002+08:00

it's 08-08-2008 today!
i mean is just like last year 07-07-2007!
so i'm looking forward for 09-09-2009 next year.
LOL!

so unique!
it's so happening today! :D

olympic opening @ beijing on the 08-08-2008 2008hrs (8.08pm)!
cool!

and i msg-ed mummy on that dot as well!
but i wonder did she receive the msg @ that time.
nah,
i'm too lazy to ask!
lol.

anyway,
i guess my back are healing.
at least i can turn my head a little bit here & there.
doing ROM by myself.
:D

but it seem like my nerve got affected.
numbness...

see how my condition goes.
i will consult a doctor if it worsen.
give me 2 more days!
:)

alright.
been studying from 9am to 7.15pm!
kind of tired now.

but of cos,
with 3hours of break in between.
i need to attend tutorial as well.
hahas :D

very productive for today.
at last i managed to cover almost all the topic for HS3033!
WOORAY!
:D

hence i'm giving myself a break!
haha.
and i need to rest my left hand if not my back is hurting me again.
something is wrong again!
:(

back to study tml morning.
i shall rest early tonight,
since i woke up so early today!
wahahahahahas.

take care everyone.
study hard!
:D

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-07T23:08:00.002+08:00

okay.
tml will be the last day of school!
WOORAY!

and which means exams coming up nxt.
sian...

it's study time again
:(

but studying with a stiff head and in pain isn't good at all.

and ya,
i injuried my back.
thought is just a normal muscle pull.
but i don't think is so simple.

cos i felt numbness on my hand yesterday.
shit...

but the numbness was gone this morning.
so i guess i'm in recovering stage!
LOL

and YOU went to tell mummy.
so i received an order from mummy...
but the msg seem funny.
haha...

i know my body well.
so i will see a doctor if my condition is getting worse!
haha.

thanks for all concern!

get well soon to myself.
:D

okay then.
back to study again!

study hard everyone!
:D

with loves,

stranger

2008-08-05T12:37:00.005+08:00

the last 5 hours break for tuesday!
:)

but still abit sian leh.
no more group meeting.
fewer lesson.
but clinical lab,
the only lesson which no one can escape from that.
LOL.

most of my classamte went out for a mini-gathering.
i didn't join.
not that i don't want,
but i'm broke.
:(

so i decided to meet yanyin and kellyn to study together since we have long hours breaks in between lesson.
but why am i still rotting in e-plaza?

reasons being the two got extra-lesson which popped out from heaven.

so here am i,
downloading all the e-lect and e-tut.
and blogging...
sian...

anyway,
it's august already!
and is a birthdayS month as well :)

happy birthday to all the following:

- pingying 18
- hailing 21
- jiaxuan 21
- tingyu 19
- peixuan 19
- wenxun 21
- dolly 20
- daphne 19
- jieqi 19

anyone else that i missed out?
sorry and happy birthday to you as well!
best wishes to all birthday girls!
:)

okay.
i'm spending more than what i can already.
so dead.

with loves,
stranger

2008-08-02T01:06:00.003+08:00

just bath-ed and ate my dinner not long ago.
or should i say is supper?
whatever lah!
:\

and i'm feeling so uncomfortable now.
due to all the undigested food inside my little stomach!
waiting to be digest anyway!

i'm really tired,
and wanted to sleep right now,
but i guess i have to wait for part of my dinner to be digest first.
so that i can have a good rest and sleep!
:)
and i broke a plate while washing and cut myself!
sucks!
:(

but know what!
no more ICA presentation for my group!
-did i mention in my previous post? -

and yes,
today was the last ICA presentation.
and is time to concentrate for sem exams!

and mr. george lim, being the group leader of my group,
was kind enough to treat us ice-cream!
3 cheers for george!
:D

next week will be the last week of school.
and i have decided which tut/lect to skip!
but too bad,
cant skip clinical!
sian..........

but that's okay.
is like the only time whereby everyone is there!
:D

enough of schooling stuffs.
kinda of getting bored already.

anyway,
at least tml is a good day.
cos at least 3 people whom i knew are having their own birthday celebration at 3 different places!
lol.

and i'm going to donate blood tml!
wooray.
i'm a good kid!
:)

but mummy said i'm a evil kid!
hahahahas.
it's okay.
is her genes anyway!
:)

so wanted to go taiwan that much,
but without mum's accompany.
cos it simply spoil the mood.
that's bad.

i just want to enjoy myself.
but why can't i?
and i had so many arguement with my mum!
i'm just super unhappy with her nowadays!
the way she thinks and do,
it really pissed me off!
:(

forget about it!

on a happier note:
it's nurse's day!
1st august 2008
happy nurse's day everyone!
:D

and i shall wait for yy to send me photo for today.
then i can blog it out!
haha.

my eyes are closing.
foods are still waiting to be digest.
that's really sucks!

i shall not wait anymore.
i'm going to sleep.

take care
and good nights! :D

with loves,

stranger

2008-07-31T23:11:00.002+08:00

yeah,
i'm back! :)
and tmr will be the last presentation for my group!
so hang on there! :)

was trying to sort out the photo in my folder just now.
but it seem hard for me.
simply due to too many photos!
GOSH!
i seriously need to clear all the repeated photos!
:(

just random-pick some folders to look through.
so funny,
and i almost laughed my lungs out!
LOL.

was looking through all those NGs video took.
haha.
shall post it one day when i'm really that bored!
LOL

and actually SJAB are taking up most of the space.
gosh.
damn alot of photos lah!
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAS!
:D

while looking through all those photos,
it seem like it just happened yesterday.
past memories are back in my mind.

those old camping days in school,
as well as BNCO and ANCO.
be it being a camper or instructor.
how i wish i could have the time back.

those DM days,
push-up was nothing to us.
we did it almost every DM...
but now,
do a few push-up already causing body ache all over.
LOL

those passing out days,
we actually stayed back after our POP to clear up SJAB room.
:D
that was fun, despite all the hardwork done.

those campfire days held by scouts and girl guides,
we never fail to turn up every year.
i guess that's the bond between us.
but now,
hardly can remember any campfire songs liao...
:(

those sec 1 orientation days,
it was messy, hearing shouting and cheers from all UG and almost went deaf,
but it was fun, real fun :D
which you hardly can hear it now...

celebration of SJAB days,
we always did with NCC due to the date crash.
but nevertheless,
it was fun as well :D
although we stayed back almost everyday to rehearse.
that kills us indirectly :(

since sec 1 till now,
the bonding between the 6 of us are still there.
that's great.
nothing can be better than this!

to yanyin, kellyn, shengwei, peixuan and jo'an,
the bonding will lasts forever.
at least i hope so.
:D
let's meet up soon.

with misses, loves and hugs,

stranger

2008-07-29T11:50:00.003+08:00

having a straight 5 hrs break for now.
really damn sian lah.
but having meeting at 2pm later.
whatever lah.

anyway,
i wasn't in mood since this morning.
tired and sleepy.

just side-track for awhile.

oh, to someone,
the meaning of friend doesn't apply on you anymore.
or should i say you don't fit to be a friend.
another thing:
respect others = respect urself.
and why demand for help when you can jolly-well do it urself?
pointless.....

human are the funniest living object in this world.

you wanted A to change for you,
cos you doesn't want to change for that A's sake.
how silly.

but there are actually some-stupid-A who change for them!
LOL
what a funny joke.

why force others to change to perfect when you actually can't?
why are there SOMEONE who actually change for the sake of someone but not for their own sake?
why are there people who are behaving like this and that?

reasons because:
nothing can explain that :)
or simply nothing is fair in this world :D

do you still treat someone as a friend when the person can't even behave normally in front of you?
do you help the person who always bully you?

too many questions to ask and no ending to that.
but i guess there is no answer for that as well.

back from all the side-tracks! :)

being a treasurer of my class,
i was being 'chased' for $2 cos of some photocopy stuffs.
and i didn't return naf yesterday cos i only got 2 $10 note.

so i guess i should chased back all my money ASAP as well.
is like $20, $50, $45 and even $75!
owe by different people!

seriously damn broke now!

broke till i cant even pay my bill.
so dead

if i get back all my money,
then i wouldn't have so much problem!
yeah! :)

and YOU!
shall wait for me to chase you for money!
LOL

bored arh.
rot-rotting-rotted.

with loves and hatred,

stranger

2008-07-28T22:37:00.019+08:00

photos for yesterday!

but only took at ben & jerry's!

haha :)

don't ask me why i'm unhappy.

and yah! our ice-cream arrived!

treat from jiaxuan! :)

we are just fighting for that piece of banana! LOL

what's with that look and cheeky smile? :)

chen mei and jiaxuan

kel and yy promoting B&J

the ultra-woman! LOL

two-of-a- kind! LOL

as in their age! :)

cool photo. i'm dark, cos kel's finger is blocking part of the flash! LOL

DO, RE, MI!

SPEC :)

we are just copying what jiaxuan and chen mei did :)

everyone took a photo with that cow outside!

the vehicle that says : a happy camper! :)

kel and chen mei

and proudly presenting all of us.

with chen mei, jiaxuan, kel,me and yy! :)

i love night outing! :)

but provided someone drive!

LOL

oh ya,

i drove myself to school today!

and i love auto-car! :)

and jiaxuan was nice enough to fetch me back from sch!

YEAH! :)

and oh,

i guess this is the first time my whole class actually passed the practical test in their first attempt!

congrats to all :)

happy happy day!

but going to do proj again.

sian :(

bye :)

with loves,

stranger

2008-07-28T02:09:00.003+08:00

just hang up with naf not long ago.
was just listening to her for her practical tml!
haha.

good luck girl!
JIA YOU WORX!
:)

but anyway,
i just got home at 12 plus as well.
and of cos,
with jiaxuan.

guess this will be the last time we drove out together.
that's sad huh!
LOL

anyway,
i have fun today!
machiam exams are all over!
i'm dreaming, i know.
haha

went to orchard first, then PS.
to marine parade to fetch jiaxuan's friend
then back to bishan to fetch yy and kel
and drove all the way to newton circle to eat.
then to dempsey hill to eat ben & jerry!

jiaxuan sent her friend back home at eunos.
followed by kel, then yy.
and i drove the car back home!

though is a short distance!
wahahahahas.
but quite fun overall.

so long didn't drive.
and the feeling was great!
i love,
but i still prefer people fetching me instead!
wahahahahas.

alright.
shall end here.
photos will be up tml!
:)

nights.
and all the best to all who are taking practical tml!
:)

with loves and hugs,

stranger :)

2008-07-25T23:34:00.047+08:00

photos shall take over all the talking! :)

SJAB'08. ( but without ms tan)

just changing of position

standing from left to right:

sec 3, sec 2, sec 1

with NEW O.I.C

the current NCOs

the ex-NCOs

with officers

it's party time! :)

full SJAB'08

the 7 ex-NCOs.

wishing upon...

peixuan. ms lee. me. mummy. yanyin.

the 3 joker officers! :O

mummy. me

(with mummy's present)

ex-OICs: 2004(yanyin). 2005(miaoxin). 2006(arinah but not present).

2007(priscilla). 2008(nadya-current)

yanyin. priscilla

priscilla. me

pei xuan. adlina. yanyin. alina. miaoxin. lynn

their names are on their cards! :)

twist :)

jun kiat. yanyin

we are just trying to show how big jun kiat's eyes is.

miaoxin :D

do you know how cool this photo is! :)

look alike? lol

is just a 5000 RUPIAH note....

proudly presenting my 13years of junior! MIAOXIN :)

SJAB peeps...

me. yanyin. miaoxin(random)

random shot of yanyin! :)

nice one :)

we are going to eat that one day, TMMP :)

peixuan is kind enough to donate $4 to miaoxin's begging. lol!

finally got this right! :)

hey girls,

hope you all really enjoy today.

since is your POP!

all the best :)

shall end with this photo!

cos i simply love my new hairstyle that much! wahahahahahas :)

with loves,

stranger

2008-07-10T15:52:00.002+08:00

what are friends?
who deserve to be one?

second time posting about this topic.
or perhaps i don't get the true meaning of friends yet.

2008-07-10T15:44:00.003+08:00

in school e-plaza now
SUPER BORED ARH!

with straight 4 hours break for the next tutorial.
this shows how sucks the school timetable is.

or i prefer more of secondary school timetable?
mmm.
is like everyday timing is fixed!

how good.
but guess there wouldn't be any more chance...

seriously,
i'm missing my seconday school life...

but time NEVER run backward.
i know...

if time EVER run backward,
i will take the chance to do alot of things which i regreted.

would i be given a chance?

answer: no......

signing off....

i will upload yy's birthday surprise soon...
oppx.....

with loves,

stranger

2008-07-03T00:04:00.002+08:00

and yesh,

back to blogging...
after so long
i know...

not gonna update about my daily routine...
after so long...
almost forgot about everything...

just a few events that i remembered.
- sheng wei's birthday on 20th june.
- helping out in sj and ncc video
- visit joyce at nuh.
- gathering with primary school friends.
- presentations...
- going school
- rotting....

all i know is,
i'm tired.
i'm not longer myself...

i'm stressed
not by studies,
but by people i guess.
and that is the worse of all.

i can control studies stress.
but i can't control stress caused by people!
i hate that!

so for now,
stress is controlling me.
and is caused by human!
:(

i hate school for now...

alot of things happened.
that's it!

family problems are adding...
or rather,
i'm glad at least is not directly from my family.
but i'm worried for cousin's side instead.
so dead...

no one is gonna understand again...
and all they did is adding on top of everything.

i'm so dead.
i'm tired.

and i'm feeling sick.
not having enough rest...

signing off
or sighing off?

with loves,

stranger

2008-06-17T22:31:00.002+08:00

what is life?
something brittle and fragile...
and it's fated.

read george's blog last night.
another life...

quite bored last night.
so went to search for online newspaper,
but can't find.

so went to search for m'sia newspaper instead,
but still can't find any news about my cousin's accident.
it's okay.

just want to read about that.
or i'm just too bored.
haha.

talking about last night,
i'm being 'guai' in some way!
wahahahahahas.

anyway,
i stayed at home for most of my holiday.
not really that boring.
haha.

cause i love staying at home.
lol.

oh ya,
my sister was diagnosed with chicken pox.
and she went to PC fair on the sunday with me!
so most prob she got it from the crowd!
haha.

but hers is worse than mine!
mine is mild,
while hers is quite serious.
even i can feel the itchiness!

okay lah.
shall end here.
update again.

take care.
cherish especially your own life....

with loves,

stranger

2008-06-09T21:14:00.002+08:00

not everything is suitable for a friend to comment on.

sometimes,
keeping quiet might be the best asnwer.

but quiet doesn't mean no answer/no comment.
cause my answer might influence your answer or it's just a mistake.

follow your heart in the first place.
after asking for friend's comment/answer,
the result might be different.
ended up with regrets.
so what for asking for comment?

sometimes,
giving ONE comment is mistakes.
so why giving comment when it's a mistake?
so pointless.

hence,
isn't keeping quiet is the best choice?
or i should say no comment would be better?

with loves,

stranger

2008-06-08T23:44:00.002+08:00

choose to let go,
and you will learn to live in immediately.

let things go,
be a brand new you.

tell yourself that you will never have regrets again,
cherish people around you now.

learn to cherish,
and never take things for granted.

look forward,
but never forget to think backward at times.

just brought a book.
it's talking about how to let things go,
and how to live with it.

quite meaningful.
just read a few pages of it,
cause that is gonna lasts me throughout the holiday.

finally what we are waiting for is here!
our 2 weeks term-break!

kind of relax now.
at least there is no need for us to return school.

but going back to school for meeting on thursday and friday.
it's okay!
rather than going back to school everyday!

5 more ICAs coming up after the term-break.
HS3106-2
HS3107- 1
HS3053- 1
HS3034- 1

anyway,
i decided to relax/recharge myself during this 2 weeks.

that's when i love nua-ing at home!
not that i hate going out,
but going out = spend money.

plus friends are either busy working or going oversea.
hence,
staying at home is not a bad choice neither.
:D

shall save some money first.
planning to go taiwan with yy.

guess during october most probably.
since both of us are having a few weeks break before PRCP.

got to start planning now,
or she will start nagging at me again.
cause i took a long time to plan!
:\

i'm learning to let go.
nothing is forever.
i know.

with loves,

stranger

2008-06-03T23:22:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOYCE, MY WIFEY!

expensive present that i gave uh!
i know i still owe you another present.

a great day for you
cause i know you have enjoyed your day!
:D

with loves and hugs,

stranger

2008-06-03T22:49:00.003+08:00

he's gone.
is a fact that cannot be change again.
i know.

he was the youngest in his family.

and the one who was being left out as well.

he was on his way home after work that day,
when a car clashed into his bike at a road junction.

guess the impact was too great that
he skidded few meters away from his bike.
his head was the hit first even with helmet.

he was sent to hospital,
but after coma for around 3 hours,
his will of living ended.

it was already midnight by then.

this is how brittle,

how fragile one life is.

while flipping back the old photo albums,
so many childhood photos that we used to took together.

but as we gets older,
hardly any photo seen.

now that you're gone,
no more photo for the future...

rest in peace.

with loves and regrets,

stranger

2008-05-30T16:54:00.003+08:00

like i said before,
year 2008 is not a good year!

so many things had happened.
after grandmum's operation,
i thought bad stuffs are coming to an end.

but i'm wrong.
i'm really wrong.

now i'm facing a death of my loved one.
it happened so quickly,
that i don't have a second to react to his death.

he is not even 20.
1 year older than me.

i'm not going to see him again anymore.
cos he's gone forever.

another case of road traffic accident.
i'm not sure about what exactly happen.
that's all i know.

since young,
we always mix around.
but when we get older,
we lead our own life.
guess distance plays a part too.

i hardly could remember anything.
but the past memories kept flashing back in my mind.
then i realised,
i got back the past memories.

the last time i saw you is more than a year ago.
i have no news of you till today,
i received news about your death.

i'm shocked,

and how i wish that is just a joke.

i regretted.
how i hope that i had talk to you more when the last time i see you,
but i didn't.
and i no longer can do that anymore.

facing reality is hard.
but i know i have to,
cos i'm not given any other choice.

no matter what i do,

he's not gonna come back alive anymore.

you left us to another world of yours,
without saying anything.
it happened just so sudden.

i cried.
i'm mentally and physically break-down
i don't any extra energy to carry on.

i'm tired.
very tired...

with regret,

stranger.

2008-05-29T21:43:00.002+08:00

i tried,
but i'm not strong enough.

i kept everything in me.
and the bottle seem as if it is bottomless.

but i'm wrong.
it has its limit.
and i think things are oozing out from the bottle now.
is filled with good/bad/happy/sad,

guess i need another bottle in me now.
a slightly bigger bottle would be better.

is easy to say,
but is hard to find an outlet.

once empty,
it will be filled up again.

things are getting more complicated

i don't have a choice to choose.
saying NO is not as easy as you think.

i'm forced to, in most of the situation.
i'm left with no choice,
which i the most.

once someone told me,
is hard to understand me cause i keep changing.

with a bottle over-filled in me,
how can i not change?
i wonder.

who will understand me,
when myself don't even fit to say:
is ME.

soemtimes,
i'm even scared to face myself.

i'm one body,
but carrying many different characters/behaviours.

is my mind that is changing.
i'm mentally changing. physical fine.

if the bottle is removed one day,
i hope i still can find back the same old me......

with loves,

stranger

2008-05-28T23:49:00.003+08:00

now i wonder
is the person who invented the phone at fault,
or the person who is using it is at fault?

how stupid it is.
i wonder what i'm worried since just now.

5 peoples in one family.
each holding one handphone, plus house phone which is 6 different line.
after calling countless times to house phone,
no one answer.

hence,
i tried calling other family members.
but either the hp is off or no answer.
HOW SMART!

so is the technology of the invention of the person at fault,
or the one using it at fault?
or is it my fault?

i don't know.
and i don't wish to know.

with don't-know-what,

stranger

2008-05-26T21:25:00.002+08:00

yes, i'm back.
back from malaysia this morning.

so tiring now.
sleepy sleepy.
slept at 3am last night.
woke up at 7plus to eat WANTON MEE!
haha :D

oh ya,
my grandmum was discharged this morning.
thanks for concern everyone!
CHEERS!
:D

i'm super amazed by their nursing skills!
anyway, i did NGT feeding for my grandmum!
lol.

okay.
enough of my grandmum!
since she already discharged!
but pray hard that nothing bad will happen again*

nothing much to update actually.
just normal days.
but thursday!

went out with darl, naf, tingyu and kellyn!
weird right?
but the common link is ME!
haha :D

walked around bugis.
checked out the air ticket price for naf.
then went to eat KFC!
my god!
that was my 3rd KFC meal for 2days!

chatted alot during eating.
mainly gossip! lol
then went to pray...

then off to airport to 'fetch' people.
but the people that we are suppose to 'fetch',
went off with their family instead.
and we went for our dinner at T3
wasted of time loh.
:(

went home after that.
sleep sleep : Zzzz....

that's all.
how interesting on thursday sia.
:(

shall end off this post ASAP.
'm really tired!
:(

to joyce:
i'm glad to hear the final decision.
it must be hard for you,
but i guess is good for everyone.
i may not know what exactly how you feel,
but for whatever happen,
we will try to help.
:D

with loves,

stranger

2008-05-17T20:54:00.007+08:00

just done with the last ICA for the week.

no more presentation till after holiday.
2 more weeks to go before our holiday.

super unhappy now due to alot of reasons.
an unhappy week and tiring week for me as well.
especially thursday.

to my group members:
get over with all the unhappy stuffs.
stay together and work hard for the rest of the ICAs
cheers :)

grandmum going operation next wed.
mum is going back either wed or thur.
i wanted to go,
but there is class on friday.
how sad.

sometimes in life,
how i wish i could lie to myself.
i tried so hard,
but i know i have to face the reality.

no matter how unhappy i am,
is hard for me to say out.

technology kills.

i prefer face to face.

cos i believed there is no other communication way that is better than talking.

however,

the timing, person, environment, situation, emotion and of cos myself

there is too many factors that i rather keep it to myself.

hence,

i often choose to keep at the bottom of my heart instead.

somehow,
it will disappear one day.

i don't wish to talk it out,
mainly because i don't want others to worry too.

that's why my emo-ing periods are long,
as i need a longer time to recover and re-charge myself.

by the way,

thanks darl for yesterday chat.

loves!

P.S: i'm not emo-ing. is just another emo-ed post.

anyway,
yesterday was out with my 3 juniors and peixuan for awhile.
i really enjoyed myself.
playing the basketball and driving!
but is so unfair to me!

and i swear i got a driving license!

peixuan and me team up with basketball.
and we won with the best score of 314!
yeah.

ending this post soon.
need to finish up mummy's present ASAP.

take care.
good night.

with loves

stranger

2008-05-14T20:04:00.002+08:00

2 assessments and 2 ICAs down.

tml will be the 3rd ICA.
early in the morning.

shall sleep early tonight.
getting tired too easily nowadays.
:(

felt so emo all of a sudden just now,
so i decided to walk home instead.
just want to be alone.

managed to call back malaysia while walking home.
but didn't get the chance to talk to my grandmum yet

i'm not sure about what is happening now.
but all i know is,
grandmum is going for another operation about her gum infection again.
super sad.

pray hard that grandmum will be fine after that...

everything will soon be over.
i hope.
:(

praying hard for a good ending for this year.
too many bad things happened since the year started.
how sad...
:(

not trying to get emo again...

gonna prepare for tml ICA presentation and a review.
take care everyone.

with loves,

stranger